Chalet with the clique was totally boring except for when everyone was drinking and drunk.
One thing I hate about myself? Probably the fact that I am totally kinky once I'm drunk. I know it's stupid but I can't help myself. (Although I actually love this fact because I am honestly really kinky but I just don't show it to my friends. But being drunk makes me open and so I just hate it because of how people view/think of me because of this.)
But I swear last night was the best out of all, I have to admit that B was great! He totally knows his way around. It felt too good that I was too loud and now the whole chalet knows and it's awkward. But fuck it, I'll just pretend like I forgot what happened if any of them bros decides to ask me. I'm pretty glad that we talked it out and we're both fine. Wouldn't want what happened to make things awkward between good friends huh.
I just don't know how I'm to face my best friend right now, she seems pretty mad. And to think that H was the first one to hear my moans and tell the rest, to think that he thought I had sex with B and that he is affected by it.... Makes me wonder if he still have some sort of feelings for me despite always showing that he doesn't. I still miss him and think about him sometimes, I admit I still kinda like him. It kills me to know this. And I still have no idea what was his reason(s) for leaving me.. Ugh! Dammit what am I to do? I am such a disgrace and sadly a disgust, sigh. I hate myself, someone please just help me out here. Shoot me. Now.
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